Unravelled, Unrepentant

By: Ananya Yadav

In whispered shadows, truths I dared not speak,

I felt the pull of softness, lips like wine,

Their touch, a lullaby that bruised my spine,

Yet loathing stitched my heart—a thread so bleak.

I wandered hallways of a crooked mind,

Each thought a viper, venom in its wake,

What if this sin was more than I could take?

In mirrors, I saw ghosts I couldn’t find.

I cursed my skin, the way it blushed and sighed,

To touch the silk of women, strange and soft,

My desires flew like ravens, wild, aloft,

But shame was there, a thorn I could not hide.

Was I a fracture of the world’s cruel jest?

An aberration drawn in twisted lines,

I swallowed every hurt, every decline,

My own reflection felt like some cruel test.

Oh, how I longed to rip myself in two,

To sever off the parts that felt so wrong,

But still, I heard it, soft—a siren’s song,

That said my truth was fierce, my heart was true.

Time spun its web, and through the murky haze,

I found my pulse beneath the jagged din,

I was no sin, no tarnish, no chagrin,

But art reborn in unapologetic praise.

I learned to cradle all my cracks and seams,

To wear my difference like a velvet cloak,

Not every fire that burns is meant to choke,

And not all dreams must fit the common themes.

The world had lied; there was no single way,

To love, to live, to revel in one’s skin,

No glossy script where queerness could begin,

But countless paths where I could proudly stay.

I am a canvas stained with every hue,

A masterpiece of tears, of wounds, of grace,

No longer bound to play the weary chase,

I am my own, and all my shades are true.

Now, I stand fierce, my truths upon my lips,

A lover of women soft and kind,

With hands that cherish, knowing I can find,

My worth within—no more eclipse, no scripts.

For I am more than what they say of me,

A riot, an enigma, undefiled,

A work of art, both tender and reviled,

And only I define what I shall be.

I am unapologetically myself, not seeking their approval,

I know who I am, and that truth sets me free,

I cannot truly live without embracing my identity,

No longer hiding from the echoes of my own heart,

I’ve spent years wrestling with a love that won’t depart,

I will love as I love, with dignity and removal.

I wear my queerness like the deep blue sea,

Unravelled, unrepentant, raw, and true.

“So, the poem is about a journey from self-loathing to self-love, and follows a narrative of the poet's empowerment and acceptance of herself and the fact she likes women.

She believed there was something ‘wrong’ with her however over time this changed, the realisation of how she can't be herself unless she accepts herself hit

Thus she embraced her true self slowly but steadily, though she didn't fit into the media's portrayal of queer women nor the society's norm of being straight, she figured all that mattered was she knew who she loved and that there was no right way to be gay.” —Ananya Yadav